Tito Alex

It has been 40 days since the untimely demise of my uncle Dr Alejandro "Alex" V Albano. I remember how my dad called me twice that 4th of April, Saturday afternoon to inform me about the sad news.

When he returned to Manila in the late 1970s, with Tita Peachie and cousins Ate Ritzie and Ate Leli, they were our next-door neighbour. Tito Alex was a silent type of guy, something that sets him apart from the other noisy members of the clan (no pun intended!).

Many years after they went back to the States, I got a surprise phone call from him updating me about Lola Piling (who was hospitalised at that time). He then asked how I was doing and advised me: "Mag-aral kang mabuti kasi 'yan ang magtataguyod sa iyo" (Study hard because that will help you forward). He then asked me if I was communicating with my dad. At that time, my relationship with father was anything but pleasant. So I told my uncle, "Ayoko po" (I don't want to). He replied "Tatay mo pa rin 'yun" (He is still your father).

I would not forget that night way back in 1994 when Tito Alex called and his words of wisdom. I never had any similar conversation with him later on. I have the impression that the words he told me came from the depths of his heart. And the only way one could truly discern what's in one's heart is to be silent. 

We all need silence. And this comes to the fore, especially during this lockdown. Silence to reflect on what life has to offer, silence to "listen with the ears of the heart" (St Benedict of Nursia), silence to think, silence to make decisions, silence to acknowledge who you are in the sight of God, silence to be grateful, silence to enjoy one's blessings.

My Lolo Paul once wrote: "Growth is silent". Reflecting on the life of Tito Alex, I think he took to heart Lolo's words. In Tito Alex's silence, he faithfully and lovingly cared for Tita Peachie and his family, he diligently looked after his patients, he humbly did the will of God. Tito Alex grew to be an exemplary person.

May his silence challenge us to become more humble, compassionate, and considerate to those entrusted to our care.

Thank you, Tito Alex, for being such a wonderful uncle. May God, who speaks and is heard of in silence, welcome you into His healing presence.

My love to Tita Peachie and family in this time of sorrow and grief.

Silence

I woke up last Sunday without my voice. I don't why or how it happened.  I struggled to talk. I couldn't sing during the Mass. During our night prayers, it was only Chiara singing the Salve Regina. When I went to work the following day, our team leader wondered why I was silent.  Someone called and I have to pick up the phone. Luckily, the conversation wasn't that complicated. I didn't go to work for three days.

I slowly gained my voice as the days go although it's still husky (and couldn't sing!) as I write this. In a way, I accepted my 'silence' as a Lenten penance.  As a member of the Apostleship of Prayer, I offered it for the Sacred Heart of Jesus' intentions and those of the Holy Father. On the bright side, silence meant that I could focus on what I am doing be it at home or at work.  It also meant to listen attentively to the one you communicate with, otherwise you'll end up asking (read: talking) for more. Silence also provided a way for me to be careful with the words I say, to speak with tact. 

But there is more than these to silence.  Hidalgo Del Arrabal, one of our contributors in the web, wrote this last year:

Tanging sa katahimikan

Diyos nakikipagtalastasan;

Tanging sa mapagkumbaba

Poon nagbibigay-biyaya.

Purihin ka, O San Jose

Pinakinggan mo ang mensahe

Mag-inang sa Ama nagbuhat

Pinangalagaan mong tapat!

(Only through silence

Does God communicate;

Only to the humble

Does He give grace.

Praise you, O Saint Joseph

You listened to the message

Mary and her Child who came from the Father

You faithfully looked after!)

It's nearly the feast of St Joseph. This humble carpenter from Nazareth was known as a silent worker, someone who would prefer to work in the background.  Both the poor in the Philippines and the religious worldwide (2015 is a special year for both groups of people) can draw inspiration from St Joseph. 

For the poor whose abject condition has silenced them to the whims of the powers-that-be, this great saint comes as an example of complete trust in the Lord and working diligently. St Joseph lived in poverty too, but didn't buy into any shortcuts or 'instants' (instant rich, instant ginhawa, etc.).  

For the religious, St Joseph is a very good example of following the evangelical counsels - poverty, chastity, and obedience. Through their faithful witness to these three vows, they offer the world something different, something of more value, something that isn't just a fad, but has lasting character.

May St Joseph's silence inspire us in our Lenten journey to become more attentive to that message which God is conveying us. May his silence transform us into faithful stewards looking after those who were entrusted to us - family, community, environment, the poor and needy.

Mabuhay si San Jose!

***

It's Mother's Day (or Mothering Sunday) here in the UK tomorrow. My fervent prayers and best wishes to all moms, especially to my wife and to my mother, on their special day.  May St Joseph watch over you. May his silence encourage you to keep up the good work and become more open to God's grace. Happy Mother's Day!